29.2 Preparing the Child and Adoptive Family for Adoption
Adequate preparation of the child is critical to the lasting success of the adoption. The child should be allowed ample time and opportunity to deal with his feelings related to his separation from his current family, i.e., birth and/or foster family. The Children’s Service Worker should engage the child in all stages of the adoption process beginning with identifying the type of family the child would most like to be a part of. Also, the worker should carefully observe the child's behavior and encourage the child to talk about his perceptions about the adoptive family during the pre-placement phase. Most children will provide clear clues about their readiness and comfort level in proceeding with the adoptive placement. The following is a list of activities the worker should do to ease the child's transition into the adoptive family's home:
- Share information with the child about the family. Sharing can be in the form of discussion, photographs, videotapes and letters from the family, etc.
- Give child's profile of non-identifying information to the adoptive parents and acknowledge receipt by signing and dating the Adoption Placement Summary.
- Facilitate pre-placement visits between child and adoptive family. The frequency, length and setting will vary based on the child's age, development and comfort level.
- Discuss each pre-placement visit with the child, foster family and adoptive family individually.
- Discuss separation and grief issues and potential behavior problems with the adoptive family.
- Emphasize the child's ethnic/cultural needs with the child and family.
- Encourage child to share/discuss his life book with adoptive family.
- Encourage the adoptive family to allow the child to talk about the people who have cared for him and those he has cared about in the past.
- Negotiate with the child and family a plan for post-placement visits for the child with siblings if applicable, foster family and/or significant others.
- Engage child's therapist in the placement process.
- Arrange a closure "good-bye" visit between child and foster parents.
- Inform adoptive family about available support groups and encourage their participation.